Archive for February, 2006

One for Michael Jeung

But the rest of you will probably get a kick out of it too.

I give you: Ask A Ninja

26

02 2006

On a role…

Most people would agree that casting can make or break a movie, but this is especially true when that movie is based on a popular pre-existing work whose characters have been individually interpreted by millions of fans. Sometimes, a casting choice can be absolutely perfect. Sometimes not so much.

So, with this in mind, who do you think should play the Joker in the upcoming sequel to Batman begins? Extra credit for ideas on other future Batman, X-men, or Superman/Justice League characters. (Yes I realize some of these movies won’t get made, just have fun with it :-D)

24

02 2006

For your consideration

As some of you know, I have a fairly strong inclination on this issue, but I’d be interested in hearing what others think before launching into it.

22

02 2006

Mouse Avoider Game

1425 baby.  Bring it.

1425 Score

Edit: Final Fantasy Movie that you have probably never seen before.

Edit the second: Identify this mystery movie clip.

20

02 2006

A Line Needs to be Drawn

I love the olympics. The olympics are the single most amazing sporting event in the world. They bring together people from all over the world, many of whom (with the exception of a few media-created “stars”) work every-day jobs while spending the rest of their waking hours training their asses off so that once every 4 years MAYBE they get a chance just to appear in the olympics. And you know what? They cherish every minute of it, and usually once a day you get to see someone who never thought they had a chance live their dream. And then you get to watch them in the moment they realize they’ve surpassed their most wonderous fantasy. That’s pure human drama, and it is beautiful.

For that reason, there’s something I need to get off of my chest. Some of these events are NOT olympic sports. They have no place in this otherwise majestic event and they need to be done away with. And I am just the man to do it.

Its worth noting that an event could be a sport and not of olympic caliber, or even vice versa. But perhaps some examples would provide a better illustration. First on the chopping block: Snowboard Cross. This vile infection of the games features 4 snowboarders racing down a course which has been shaped to look more like a forum for tricks than for speed with races being decided by who crashes into who more often than by skill. I watched all the women’s races today. Only twice did the person ahead at the first turn not win. Once she was taken out, and in the other it was thanks to the fact she was so FAR ahead that she decided to showboat and then promptly found herself on her ass while the boarder she had trounced passed her by. So here’s the skinny on snowboard cross: First, NOT a sport. I’m sorry, if you wear that much clothing while you’re doing it, it almost certainly can’t be a sport. Look at downhill skiing. Those guys are wearing a helmet, skis and underwear. The snowboarders are wearing three layers of winter clothing and stussy headbands with studs on them (see the australian half-piper). As an external example, look at the idiot American skiers who wore respectively, a tiara and beads during their slaloms and had their asses handed to them. In the olympics, fashionable is flying downhill faster than any human should and eeking out a win by hundredths of a second over a two minute course. A sport which does not get that does not belong in the olympics. But there’s a better reason why this sad attempt to put nascar into the games so the Americans can win more medals should be shown the door. It’s just not olympic, because snowboarding is not the best way to move on the snow. In my eyes, snowboard cross falls in the same category as speed walking and the breast stroke. If we already have running and the freestyle, then what’s the point of needlessly handicapping yourself. The rule is first one across the line/to the other side of the pool/down the hill wins and enough with this nonsense about seeing if we can create more meaningless events. Anyone who thinks that someone on skis on the same course would not have destroyed anyone on a board down that course is fooling themselves.

Snowboard Cross, however, is outdone in its inanity by its bastard sibling the Half-pipe, not just for all of the reasons already listed, but because of a problem shared by a lot of other non-olympic olympic sports–Judging. I’m sorry, but any sport whose sole criteria for victory is what a judge gives you just raises all sorts of problems. This isn’t the same as sports which are refereed mind you. I’m talking about ice skating, diving, etc. Mind you, most of these ARE sports in my opinion. They’re incredibly difficult. But who wins is still basically a crapshoot. Maybe we could keep them in the games, because there is wonderful artistic merit to ice skating and diving strikes me as approaching the purity of human activity that the games should be about. But judged snowboarding? Give me a break. Are we gonna put skateboarding in the olympics? That is the day the IOC has one extra Bocash in the world to worry about.

Third on the list: Ice Dancing. Very pretty, don’t get me wrong, and not easy, but imagine taking Figure skating, already on thin ice as an olympic sport (ahhh, I crack me up) and then removing almost everything that makes it difficult. At least in ice skating there’s only a few elite who can do all the moves that go into a truly great routine, which sort of takes the purely subjective judges out of the equation. Not to mention when you see a guy hurl his partner into a 4 rotation death spiral on ice, that’s kind of cool. But Ice dancing??? In the first segment of the competition every pair does the EXACT SAME ROUTINE. It’s ballroom dancing on ice for god’s sake. If they want it, they can make it an exhibition event. Right along with figure skating. Honestly it’s more fun to watch the pairs who have no chance of winning go out and do a fun routine they’ve really worked hard on than to see the top competitors go out, play a song that has nothing to do with the routine and then skate around pretending to be graceful in between the big ticket maneuvers that get them all the points.

While we’re at it, we’re getting rid of the freestyle skiing. Moguls AND jumps? This is like how every soda company in the world is now in an arms race to combine flavors no one has combined before. God Bless Cherry Vanilla Prune Juice but it doesn’t belong in the olympics.

The other problem with these horrid judged events is that their stench spreads to other sports. For goodness’ sake the SKI JUMP is judged. They actually have judges who give marks on form for the ski jump. Is any one else bothered by the fact that a guy who jumps ten meters farther than another can be nicked for having “worse” form? I mean really, if you’re jumping over a crevace of jagged icicles, the guy who DOESN’T impale his head on a spike has better form. Period, end of story, get rid of the judges, guy who lands the farthest down the hill wins. 

Fourth: Curling. I hate to say this, because honestly, I really like curling. It’s a fantastic game. But in the end its still a GAME. Not that this alone means it couldn’t be in the olympics, but the motto of the olympics IS “faster, higher, stronger”. Chess doesn’t meet that criteria, and neither does curling.

On that note, short track speed skating barely makes the cut. I was kind of against it, because I do think it is more mental than physical, and it really sucks to watch great athletes frequently have their chances destroyed because some other athlete crashes into them. But you have to go fast, you have to be smart, and I’ll let it stay because I love regular speed skating so much. But its on probation…double secret probation.

There are a couple of sports you may think I’ve left off the list, but which I’m going to go ahead and stand up for. First, I’m sure there are some of you out there who think luge or skeleton are not sports. You know who you are, but I also want you to know that you’re wrong. Very wrong. You want to tell me that hurling yourself down a tube of ice with nothing but your butt muscles standing between you and a bone shattering death? That’s what I thought. But what about DOUBLES LUGE you say. Ten minutes ago I would have agreed with you, but then I thought, well…what if you’re survival depended on someone else’s butt muscles? You just can’t find that kind of interpersonal faith in most team sports. So its in.

Also, the biathlon. “Guns in the olympics?” you say. Preposterous! Not so! The olympics are ancient, and their roots like in activities that humans have done for centuries. In the wintery north, that means skiing and shooting something to eat. Also, can you imagine how fast you’d be skiing if you’re in first and the guy behind you has a RIFLE. Yeah, we have to keep the biathlon….maybe even let them shoot the snowboarders.

17

02 2006

Welcome to the new Brainfarts

As many of our faithful readers know (and I know there are many of you!), Brainfarts started several years ago when Pat and Emmy somehow got the idea that it would be fun to post random thoughts on the internet. Seeing as I am Emmy’s faithful manservant and Pat’s good friend, they turned to me to put put together a little site for them and I gladly obliged. (Little did they know that I was carefully harboring my secret intention to horn in on their little show and use it as a forum for posting my random thoughts on the internet. Suckers.)

Thanks to Shawn generously offering to host the infant site in his web space over at rebelgamers.com, we were able to put together a fun little page to help all of our then college student friends procrastinate doing their homework. And that was good. But then a couple weeks ago something happened; the templates that were used to present all our random musings to the world were suddenly and unceremoniously eaten by the database that stored them.

Initially, I was inclined to just give up on the whole endeavor. Most of our friends were no longer college students, many of them had left Davis to pursue the next great adventure in their lives, general interest in Brainfarts seemed to be dying, and I was feeling too lazy to bug Shawn for the access I needed to try and recover the templates. But then it dawned on me that this was a great excuse to start over with the site. Not only was it a chance to rebuild it using a newer and more flexible infrastructure, but it was a chance to bring new life and purpose to the site as well.

So here it is: rather than being a place where a geographically close group of friends can avoid school work by reading the musings of a couple of people they see every day, I want Brainfarts to become a place where that now geographically dispersed group of friends can avoid the hassles of real life by not only reading each other’s musings, but by also sharing their own. But wait, isn’t that what MySpace is for? Well, maybe, but I’m hoping to provide a more personal (and less advertisement infested) environment than MySpace does, and hopefully people will find some value in that.

So set yourself up with an account using the link in the “meta” category of the sidebar. Within a day or so, Emmy or I will give you the access privileges necessary to post. Then, have at it whenever you feel like it.

The interface provided by WordPress (the blog script we are now using) is pretty slick and easy to use. However, let me know if you have any questions about it. Keep in mind that the look and feel of the site is still a work in progress, but let me know if you have any suggestions about what you would like to see. Also, if there are any posting categories you would like to see or use, more can be added at any time. And, if you would like to have and manage your own set of links to external sites in the sidebar, let me know and I’ll set that up for you too.

But wait, there’s more! It’s a fact that I like to play with new toys. Additionally, I have desire to, if you’ll pardon the expression, pay forward Shawn’s generosity. As such, there will be a lot more to the new Brainfarts than just this blog soon enough. I plan to install a few other neat gadgety web tools for everyone to use, such as a photo gallery tool. Also, I’ll be glad to host email and custom websites (of your own design, of course) for those who are interested. I’ll post more details on these projects as I have time to work on them, so keep an eye out for that.

16

02 2006

Post Pirate!

Hardy Harr harr! I’m the post pirate!

15

02 2006

Brainfarts returns!

And it will be better than ever… soon.

I’ll probably be giving the site not so generic look this weekend, but in the meantime please register an account (there’s a nifty little link over there under “Meta”) and I will set you all up as contributors, meaning you can post entries. Also, let me know if you are interested in an email address at brainfarts.org — I can promise that it will be good for at least another two years, and I won’t force you to change to a brainfarts-alumni.org address later on down the line. ;)

15

02 2006